Monday, January 25, 2010

Underbelly Day - Anklebiters and the Supreme Douchebag

First up, Andree:

Superior Court Judge Patrick McKay ruled on Friday that former Gov. Sarah Palin did not violate state law by using private e-mails to conduct state business.

The lawsuit filed by longtime Palin critic Andree McLeod questioned whether Palin attempted to get around the public records law through broad exemptions or private e-mail accounts. McLeod claimed the governor used private e-mail accounts to keep the records out of the public archive on purpose....Palin’s staff maintained her use of the account was perfectly legal....

Assistant Attorney General Michael Mitchell told McKay that state officials should be able to decide what is or isn't subject to public disclosure. In urging the case be tossed last month, Mitchell said that if the use of Yahoo or other non-state accounts are to be banned for state business, the Legislature, not a court, should say so.

On Friday, McKay agreed. "The Legislature is free to take up the matter," McKay wrote, "but as the statutes are currently written, private e-mail accounts may be used to conduct state business, subject to the same laws and regulations related to preservation as e-mails originating from state servers."

Celtic Diva is screaming at the top of her lungs about executive privilege and this ruling, etc....

Calm down and try to have a rational thought, for once. The judge ruled according to the law. If you have a problem with how the state does e-mail and executive privilege, lean on the legislature to change the law. The judge can't invent law based on her opinion or yours.

I don't know what they think they'll find. She's not Governor anymore, so it's not like it makes a difference anyway. This is just a mindless attempt to get any dirt possible to destroy Palin. Period.

Personally, I'd love to see all of Palin's emails. They fascinate me. I guess we can thank them for a couple of peeks into the way Sarah does business anyway.

And now we turn to the Douchebag General, the one, and (thank goodness) the only, Levi Johnston.

From pudgy and clueless to, well, insert your favorite phrase. Didn't take long, did it?

Before I proceed, a disclaimer: I do not know Levi. He may be a perfectly nice person. I don't know the situation, all I know is what I've seen. All I can do is draw conclusions based on the information in front of me. And now, we begin....

You know what was telling for me? When Levi went on CBS and said that he didn't understand why the Palins were so upset with him about the Vanity Fair article and other things. He seemed genuinely bewildered. After all, it was just little stuff. Just little stuff. The Palins are huge celebrities now, why shouldn't he get a piece of that pie? Why should the Palins be mad that he make a few bucks off of trashing them a little bit?

It was just little stuff.

I saw that and I thought, "Wow. This kid honestly doesn't get it. He's got to be either young and stupid, or the most selfish human being on the planet. He's nineteen years old, and he has no concept that the universe is bigger than he is."

Levi, hate to break it to ya, but in the 2008 election there were more important things on the line than whether or not you got to keep your mullet.

And what is the ever-dredged-up excuse for the "trash for cash"? "She drug me to the RNC, so she deserves what she gets."

You must be joking. What a flimsy excuse to trash your child's family. Before reporters knew Levi's last name, they were calling every likely baby daddy in the phone book named "Levi" to see if it was you. As if your life would have been easier had you skipped the RNC.

But let's not let logic get in the way of PDS, shall we? After all, nothing is your fault. Nothing is due to the fact that sometimes life just sucks. No. It's all the fault of that horrible Sarah Palin.

Sarah Palin forced you to knock up her daughter. Sarah Palin forced your mother to deal drugs. Sarah Palin forced your father to leave home. Sarah Palin forced you to lose your job. Sarah Palin forced the media to camp out on your front lawn. Sarah Palin forced you and Bristol to fight and break up. Sarah Palin is the cause of every problem you've ever had and ever will have.

Never mind that Sarah Palin had five kids of her own to deal with, a grandchild, a state to run, anklebiters to shake off, a debt running up daily, etc.... Yeah. Pretty sure putting Levi's life back together was the last thing on her mind.

Oh, and for those who say Sarah used Levi - what on earth do you think you're doing? Do you think you're helping the kid? Do you think pandering to the boy and giving him excuses to ruin his life is going to help him?

You don't care one cent about Levi. You just want him to do your dirty work. You're just foaming at the mouth in anticipation of what you construe to be him bringing the Palins down. Once he's served his purpose, you'll leave him in the gutter that you've dragged him to.

As for Levi's big secrets, I say, spill 'em. Come on, Levi. Don't give me this, "Sarah hates my guts and would shoot me if I knocked on her door, but I'd never hurt her" garbage. You say you've got dirt, let's see it. Write that book. Lay it all out. A good hunter doesn't wound his prey and then leave it to suffer until it dies. A real hunter finishes off his kill. You've already stuck the knife in Sarah's back, you might as well give it a good twist. Come on, Levi, turn that sucker. Wiggle it around, make sure you hit all the main arteries. You say you've got the info to destroy her? Do it. If you're gonna go scum, might as well go full scum. No more halfies. If Sarah really is the monster you make her out to be, you'll be doing the country a service. If she's the sick mental patient some claim she is, you'll be doing her kids a service. Come on, Douchebag - spill it.

Wassa matter? The Palin-haters await. You are their last great hope - the last little sliver of frost left from that iceberg. Your followers are hungry for some Palin-meat. Don't let them starve to death.

What? Why are you just standing there? Don't tell me that on top of everything else you're a coward too.


You know what it reminds me of? Elijah and the prophets of Baal. "Just cut yourselves a little more. Just shout a little louder. Maybe he's on vacation. Maybe he's taking a nap. Surely if you just beg another hour or two, he'll wake up and consume your sacrifice."

I'm sure Levi loves his son. How can you not love your son? But Levi was vulnerable after breaking up with Bristol and Sarah simply had her hands too full to make sure his life was in order along with everything else she had to deal with at the time. And who stepped in to fill that gap? Let's just say a couple of people who made sure to channel Levi's troubles and the bitterness that had to be there right in Sarah Palin's direction.

"You know why all this is happening, don't ya kid? Sarah Palin dragged you to that Convention."

Not that the Palin family is guiltless. After Levi's first interview or so, I actually was against the knee-jerk reaction many had against Levi. In that first round, I don't think Levi was trying to be a scumbag. He was just a dumb kid. But after a year of constant attacks, he got lumped into the enemy camp. This allowed Rex and Tank to say, "See? Sarah really doesn't care about you. She called you a liar," etc.... And the rest is history.

Levi doesn't seem to really know anything. "I don't know, my lawyer knows. I don't know, my lawyer knows. My lawyer told me." Levi, Tripp is not your lawyer's son. Does your lawyer go to the bathroom for you too?

You've still got a chance to fix this. You're still young. There's still plenty of time. But you have to make up your mind. Are you going to continue to listen to those who give you an excuse to duck your responsibilities, or are you going to man up, no matter how difficult that may be?

I'm not saying it will be easy. Child support is no picnic and dealing with a family that probably isn't too thrilled with you right now isn't fun either. But you do what you have to do.

Life sucks, sometimes. Your life kinda sucks. But your decisions are your own. You think the Palin family hasn't gone through h*** this last year? You're not the only one who's got problems, you know. I know it's convenient to blame it all on one person, but it won't fly forever.

If you continue down this path of being played for a fool, you will live to regret it. And it won't be anything that anyone else does to you; it will be your realization of what you've done to yourself.

Then Judas, which had betrayed him, when he saw that he was condemned, repented himself, and brought again the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders, saying,

I have sinned in that I have betrayed the innocent blood. And they said, What is that to us?

And he cast down the pieces of silver in the temple, and departed, and went and hanged himself.*

*And no, I'm not saying that Palin is the Messiah and that Levi will hang himself. It's called an analogy. Just in case the idiots poke their heads in.


New User said...

Just look at Cindy Sheehan for your example. Four years down the road you'll see Ricky, having blew through all the gossip cash, camping outside on the Palin's yard with other miscreants and deadbeats.

New User said...

From pudgy and clueless to, well, insert your favorite phrase.

Treefaced and awkward?

Longnecked and douchey?

Lurch and Kerry? -_-

Seriously, he's got a dick shaped neck and head. Guess it goes with the territory.


Uffda said...

LOL! I just love that pic of him and Jon Gosselin. So fitting. So very fitting.